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Burnley 0-3 Millwall ~ Match Report

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After the mauling of QPR in mid week it was time to head northwards to the edge of civilisation as me and MrsB, joined by Del & Lin, climbed aboard the Bonemobile and set off for Burnley.


What can I tell you about Burnley that you don’t already know? The fact that you have to wipe your shoes before you leave the place doesn’t begin to describe what a desolate khazi of a place it is.

It reeks of typical northerness. You can tell the locals have neither the desire nor inclination to be dragged into the 20th century, let alone the 21st. It is a Mill town, of course it is, why wouldn’t it be, but that is no excuse for the locals to move on and extricate themselves from believing a murderous Mill owner still rules their pitiful lives.

The name itself comes from a medieval time when rivers were called Lea’s and the locals up here apparently spent most of their wretched lives trying to set fire to the water in the lamentable belief that it would bring them good fortune, hence you get Burn~lea.

Not a lot has changed…


The place gave us Chumbawamba, for pity’s sake, and Sir Ian McKellen was born here (and probably moved out a lot quicker than the time it took him to come out), it is, all in all, a very depressing, lugubrious place.

We managed to park in the ground adjacent to Turf Moor and made our way into the ground but not before Del was accosted by a young, effeminate chap who wanted his opinion on the upcoming game. Apparently the recording will be posted on something called “winkball.com”…very worrying…


Turf Moor has two decent stands and two antiquated ones. We were put in the David Fishwick Stand, which looked as old as Methuselah and we tried to make ourselves comfortable on timber seats hewn from trees that the Romans planted.


Our attention was diverted to the Lions warming up on the pitch as the booming PA system belted out the team news. Mr Jackett was forced to make one change from the winning Tuesday night side, Harris was replaced by Lisbie but the rest stayed the same so we had Forde in goal, Dunne, Ward, Robbo and Craig in defence, Henry, Trotter, Mkandawire and Townsend in the middle of the park and Morison and Lisbie up front.


Referee Ilderton got things going and it was a brisk start with both teams going at it from the first whistle. We forced a couple of early corners, one from Townsend had Burnley ‘keeper Grant performing acrobatics to punch it clear and another from Henry that saw the ball fly past everyone and out for safety.

We had a bit of a scare next when a well-worked free kick saw the home side get a header in that bounced off the top of the bar but Forde had it covered.

The play moved from end to end in an entertaining fashion but I think we had the edge over them in our endeavours. Morison was very lively with Lisbie ably assisting and it was this combo that saw Morison left with a chance to test Grant again with a delicate chip but the pace of the ball betrayed the effort as Grant gratefully collected comfortably.


About ten minutes before the break we had probably our best effort of the half when Henry picked up the ball on the right of midfield from a throw in and jinked his was past at least three if not four Burnley defenders only to see his curling effort not only beat Grant but also the far post.

The half came to a close with no goals but a lot to be happy about. We were easily on a par with the home side and with a little bit more luck in front of goal we could’ve been going off in the lead.


No changes from Mr Jackett for the second forty-five as referee Ilderton got things going. We were quick out of the blocks, hassling and chasing down a Burnley side not used to having this kind of pressure put on them at home and who were doing their best to try and over power us.

Within ten minutes of the re start we had weathered the early storm and were pushing on. We won a corner and as Townsend went across to take it I bet I was not alone in thinking that we are pretty shabby and capitalising on corner kicks but as the ball was swung over deep we watched in amazement as Robbo got his head to the ball and sent it straight into the back of the net.

The meagre travelling contingent went mental as the players celebrated right in front of us. A great start the second half but could we hold on..?

Holding on was clearly not an option. The lads sensed blood and they went for it as the home side wondered what the fuck we must’ve had with our half time cuppa.

Moments later it should’ve been goal number two as Morison performed his party piece in slipping a defender on the flank and thundering towards goal. He picked out Lisbie at the far post but the pace of the ball was too much for his strike partner and the ball whizzed past his outstretched boot.


We looked very composed now and the home side realised we were not going to crack and they soon resorted to long range efforts and crude tackling. We were class personified, the back four looking solid, the midfield like a well-oiled machine and the two up front more than a handful.

A lovely little move involving Mkandawire and Henry saw the latter put in Morison whose low effort was well saved by Grant. We were now well on top and the Burnley game plan seemed to be just to prevent us from doubling our lead.

It seemed that every time we got the ball a chance was being created. Henry and Townsend were on fire down the flanks and Henry really should’ve done better when he again tore his marker apart but just held on too long with the ball as a desperate last challenge robbed him of glory.

On the seventy-minute mark we effectively won the game. Yet another corner and this time a short one from Townsend to Henry who whipped a trademark ball into the box and there was Robbo to head in his and our second goal. 0-2!! Fantastic stuff!

Mr Jackett, exuding confidence, took off Lisbie with ten minutes remaining, choosing to give Rowlands a run out and now it was party time for the Lions and the home side capitulated immediately.

The home fans started to leave in droves as we ran their team ragged. We were creating chance after chance but I fear the lads were too concerned with glory than teamwork as on at least three occasions we broke through but ignored the easy pass, instead trying to fly solo. No names but they know who they were!

The third finally came with a few minutes left to play and it came from a kick from Forde, which was headed on by Morison, straight into the path of the mightily impressive Townsend who controlled it and then fired a shot past the deflated Grant. 0-3! What a fantastic way to finish the game off. We went potty, the players went potty, and the remaining home fans just went home.

Henry made way for Eastmond on ninety but it was just a formality as the two minutes of injury time soon passed and the three points were safely in the bag (but to be truthful, they had been since the second goal went in)


I sometimes get asked why I travel all over the place watching the Lions and when I look back on this game the answer is there for all to see. Games like this is why I and many of you do it and the feeling you get when victory is carved out so impressively is something you can never feel sitting at home watching the scores pop up on a vidi printer or whatever they use these days.

A fabulous result for Mr Jackett and the lads and who knows were this season will end for us now?

Next up we have Cardiff City visiting the Den and we owe the welsh wankers one for the daylight robbery they did to us at their place earlier in the season.

See you all there!
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